Family part 2

I think there is too much pressure on me from my family to do good in school. I understand that I am going to be the first one to graduate, and I am going to help them have a better life, but I think sometimes they don't let me be a kid. They knock me hard when I drop a little bit in school, but when I do good all I get is a good job. They always threatening me to do good in school, and on my back, which is not fair because they made some mistakes, and I want to learn from my own mistakes. They don't trust that I am mature enough to keep myself in check. Sometimes I don't even get good grades because I want to succeed, it is just to keep them off my back. My mom sometimes brag about me infront of her friends, but behind close doors I am always a target of her anger. I know it sounds like I'm dogging her, but it is just how I feel, and I always keep it real on this blog. She sometimes take out her anger on me, because I am the only one in the house that is not willing to let her have her moment, and instead get mad back. Im trying to change, but I don't think my family situation is fair. I am going to need some independence, because if I don't get it now, when I go college I'm going to start slacking.